• Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

NVC Aotearoa NZ

Celebrating the Spirit of NVC in Action

  • Home
  • NVC
    • What is NVC?
    • Who is NVC for?
    • CNVC
  • NVCANZ Trust
    • About NVCANZ Trust
    • Meet the Board
  • Get involved
    • Donate
    • Contribute
  • Training
    • Meet the NZ Trainers
    • On-Line Training
  • Practice
    • Local Practice Groups
    • Online Practice Groups
  • NVC Resources
    • NVC App for iPhone and Android
    • Feelings & Needs Cards
    • Compass Cards
    • Children’s Feelings & Needs cards
    • Heartwork Feelings & Needs Cards with Te Reo Māori
    • GROK Products
    • Dance Floors
    • Choosing Life – 3 Book Set
    • Free Resources
  • Events
  • Newsletter
  • Contact
You are here: Home / NVC / Who is NVC for? / Self

Self

Connecting with ourselves is the beginning of Communicating Compassionately.

We often grow up now even being aware that we have needs. Within our communities we may hear that we are “needy” or that we are selfish if we attempt to articulate or meet our own needs, so we grow up being disconnected to our needs.

We have much experience in judging ourselves, labelling our words or actions as “bad” or “wrong”. NVC teaches us that all we are ever doing is meeting needs and underneath our actions is a beautiful need. The strategy might be tragic, but the need is beautiful.

It is impossible to give to another if we cannot give to ourselves. We need empathy to give empathy (in other words, it is vital that we connect to our own feelings & needs before attempting to connect with what is alive in another.)

Some of the ways that we can self connect is to:

  • translate our jackals (our thoughts) into feelings and needs
  • Self empathy – what am I feeling? What am I needing
  • Receive empathy from someone who is familiar with the giving empathy NVC style – they will support us to connect with our feelings and needs by making offerings to what they might be based on what we have shared.

 

Primary Sidebar

Upcoming Events

  1. Summer Gathering

    20 January @ 4:00 pm - 26 January @ 12:00 pm
  2. Building Bridges Not Walls: Nonviolent Communication in Action with Jean

    3 February @ 10:00 am - 11:30 am
  3. Christchurch – Free Taster – Communicate 4 Connection – Thurs 4 Feb 7:30pm

    4 February @ 7:30 pm - 9:00 pm
  4. ŌTAKI: COUPLES RETREAT w/Anna & Rob

    12 February - 14 February
  5. Christchurch – Communicate 4 Connection Day 1 Val&Jim

    13 February @ 10:00 am - 5:00 pm

View All Events

Subscribe to our newsletter

* indicates required
Grouping 6325

    View previous campaigns.

    © 2021 NVC Aotearoa New Zealand